Thankful

Wow. So much has happened this summer!!

As I return to Northwestern, I attempt to count my blessings. Too bad… there are too many to count! But I can try. 🙂 Here are a few to get started…
-coworkers who turned into friends
-an adorable Little Shadow (aka Cody) who brightened my summer’s work when I was at home!
-Composing — enough said 🙂
-I received a splint in July to help with my TMJ! That has helped some so far and we’ll see how it helps as I get into the semester! This leads right into…
-Singing!! “I LOOOVE to sing!”
-Family ❤
– 4 jobs to save money for school
-Being back at ARC with my great church family!
-Spending time with Little Dude (Reed – not so little anymore!) and Jen
-Divine appointments/beautiful conversations
-Teaching music/music theory is FUN!
-A certain friend and the Adventure that we’re living! I cannot believe how the LORD has orchestrated the whole thing so perfectly. I am SO blessed!!
-Books, oh how I’ve missed you during the school year when I no longer have time for fun-reading!
-Being STILL
-Sleep — I’ve actually been sleeping well most of the summer! Hooray!
-A new beautiful yellow dress from my lovely mother 🙂
-Frolicking in the country… and the stars…. YES
-Skype!
-Running! Who knew I would come to enjoy running long distances?!
-Music (such as Chris Thile’s new Bach album that recently came out!!)
-A car of my own, named Nellie
-the SUN. Sometimes it’s hard to sit inside all day doing homework and not be able to go run and play!
-Finishing my summer classes strong!
-Lovely phone conversations with lovely people
-My roommates who I will see SOON and very SOON!
-fresh veggies. Yummmmmmm. 🙂
-Painting my room with my sissy!
-Organizing my bookshelf, which really needed it.
-Scripture
-Love, Life, Faithfulness, Perseverance, Encouragement, JOY

I could go on and on… the list would never end! But all these words to say… I am a VERY blessed, VERY thankful girl! Abba, I cannot WAIT to start this new season, this adventure called Sophomore year with You! May You be my Guide, my Leader, my Comfort and Reassurance… may You be my Love this school year. Amen. ❤

Faithfulness

The LORD has been teaching me SO much about faithfulness lately. He’s been showing me over and over how faithful He is. He never leaves me. He never rejects me. He never turns His face from me even though I sin and ignore Him or show apathy towards Him.

He’s teaching me what it looks like to be faithful in return. To obey Him not because it’s convenient, but because He calls me to obey. To be patient (suffer long) with those around me even though I’d rather go hole up in my room with Him. To preserve our Sacred time as precious, even when I don’t feel like I’m getting a lot out of it. To make prayer a priority. To YEARN for His living Word. These things all show my faithfulness towards Him and thus towards my brothers and sisters.

At P31 (a KnuHa event) on Sunday evening, we talked about the fruits of the Spirit. I immediately picked faithfulness because Abba’s been teaching me so much about it recently. We made crafts showing how He has been teaching us that fruit, or what that fruit looks like. Here’s mine:

IMG_0462

Abba, teach me more about Your Faithfulness! Stir my heart for You, that I might be faithful!

Completely Changed

What was the one experience that completely changed your life? What happened? How did it change your life?

*I’ve seen before posting before this button that says “inspire me!” I’ve always been curious about it and wanted to post something using it, but never had the time or always had a specific purpose with my posts. So today I decided to try it. Here it goes!*

Hands down,  I know for sure the experience that completely changed my life. It was when Jesus became HUMAN to me. Before this experience, Jesus had been God. He had been holy and just, powerful and mighty, sovereign and good. But He had never been fully human, personable, alive, close… He had never been REAL to me. Once I experienced what it really means to have a relationship with Him, I understood. People just don’t say “He’s 100% human and 100% divine” as a cliche remark. They mean it. They mean that He is not only the God of the entire Universe, that He is reigning over His world right now in Heaven, but that He knows each of us personally, intimately, completely. He knows our thoughts, our actions, our motivations… things about us that WE don’t even understand! And oh, how grateful I am!! If it were any other being that knew me in that way, I would be terrified in a horrible way. I mean, no other being is Good, Righteous, Omnipotent, Love, Faithful, True, Peace, Patient, and Beautiful the way He is. I feel completely safe in the arms of my Savior and my Friend.

This is the Experience, the Person, that has changed my life. I pray He has changed yours, too. If He hasn’t and you’d like to know more, please don’t hesitate to ask! I love talking… and listening.

Color, Music, Light… Oh, What Blessings!

Today has been a joyous day! The LORD had told me a few days ago to share a story from Him with a friend of mine that needed to hear it. I had known weeks ago that I would be sharing this story with her, but I also knew that I needed to wait on His timing. Today He blessed both of us with the chance to share this story from Him. What a blessing this was! Though I have shared this story with many people, it never becomes old. Jesus’s truth, His story, should never become old! He reveals more of Who He is each time I share it and He renews my courage, my hope, and my joy every time I obey Him and tell yet another brother or sister.

Today when I shared this story, my friend was captured by the light and the color in it. She was awed by the LORD’s beauty, awed by the importance that He places on creativity. The Creator made us in His image; He made us to be creative as He is and to love beauty as He does! The more we understand Who He is, the more we can be filled with JOY in observing and participating in His act of creation. By knowing Abba’s love and care for even the minutiae of our lives, we can appreciate and be attentive to even the minutest details of our own lives.
My friend and I discussed the role of an artist in our world today. We are artists who are Christians. This should make us the most creative people on the planet! We are connected to the Creator Himself; we have the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of God, IN us. This means that we have the power and creativity of the Creator Himself within US! If we are listening and obeying Him, He allows us to participate in His creative work. This can include painting, sculpture, composing, performing, drawing, and so much more! As we follow His call to create, we must listen to His leading, but we must also practice our skill. We cannot be used well if we are not being faithful with the talent and gift He has given us. I must practice writing out melodies and separate lines of music that I hear before I will be able to pick apart and write out dozens of lines that I hear in my head. When a particular piece or even one measure is frustrating and driving me crazy and I feel like quitting, I can choose to persevere or I can choose to stop trying. When I choose to keep going and do the best I can, Abba knows that I am giving Him all that I have. He sees my perseverance as being faithful. When we are faithful in the small things, He will entrust us with greater things.
LORD, may we as artists be faithful in the little things, the small notes, harmonies, colors, or specks we notice in our work that many others might not even see or hear. May we struggle through the process, knowing that it is refining and beautiful. May we persevere to discover the joy of sorrow you have planned for us in this journey of life, this journey of creating and making art!

Some Food for Thought

An Artist in the Dark

      This article was quite fascinating to me. It definitely brought many thoughts of my own to the surface from some recess of the mind, just waiting to resurface at a time such as this. What I find beautiful about it is the way in which the author does not attempt to solve the problem or resolve a firm conclusion. Instead she hypothesizes and thinks out loud for our sakes, yet lays the foundation of what we do ultimately know to be true by the last paragraph.

Abba’s Children

I am Abba’s child. He loves me. He is fond of me. He cherishes me. And all of this… BEFORE I existed in time and space.  Abba made me. He shaped me. He breathed LIFE into me. He sustains me now. He holds my body intact, the sinews of my fingers together as I type this. He speaks each piece of this beautiful creation puzzle into being. I am Abba’s child because of nothing I did or can do. How FREEING! I am resting in this amazing truth, this inexplicable beauty, this magnificent goodness.
You are Abba’s child, too. He loves you. He is fond of you. He cherishes you. And all of this… BEFORE you existed in time and space. Abba made you. He formed you. He shaped you. He breathed LIFE into you. Abba sustains you now. He holds your body intact, the veins and muscles in your eyeballs as you read this. He speaks each piece of this beautiful creation puzzle into being. You are Abba’s child because of nothing you did or can do. How FREEING! Will you rest in this amazing truth, this inexplicable beauty, this magnificent goodness?

Two Homes? Or Between Homes?

I am home again for fall break! This evening has been amazing — a wonderful birthday dinner (thank you, Dad!!), a lovely tour for my friend David who is staying with us for fall break, cuddling with my adorable dog Cody who has been missed and has missed me so much! Also card games with my siblings and David have been quite fun. 🙂
As fun as this has been and even though it has only been one evening, I’m finding myself with a strange predicament of feelings.
I feel as if I have two homes; or maybe I am between homes.
I know this isn’t an uncommon feeling. Missionary kids probably feel this a lot, as do people who move frequently or business kids whose parents move continents often. I came home to find my room switched around and my stuff in boxes or moved. I came home as a visitor. Yet college is not exactly home, either. I share a room with two other people. Now, this is lots of fun, don’t get me wrong, but I am not fully myself there as I have been here at my house. I don’t sing constantly in my dorm room as I do at home. I don’t hum and joke and laugh with my roommates in the same way that I do with my sister and brother.
It’s an interesting feeling… one that I don’t think will truly go away in this life. I mean, we’re always going to be moving around. Even if we aren’t moving around, we’ll still find ourselves in situations and circumstances which lend themselves to awkwardness, loneliness, or fear. There will always be a certain uncomfortableness to life, I’m finding. I think this is a good thing, as painful as it can seem at times. It keeps us on our toes. It keeps us from becoming complacent. It keeps us growing. Thriving. Thinking. It keeps us ALIVE.
As you face uncomfortableness today, think about where Home is. Think about Who makes home Home. Why should we feel at Home where we are now, at this moment in time and place?! In fact, I think I might be frightened if I did feel completely at Home here and now. That would mean there’s no other Place I’m living for, and that certainly isn’t true! Where and When are you living for?

True Life

Patience. Tolerance. Long-suffering.
Self-conciousness. Hopefulness. Let down.
Sadness. Sorrow. Love. Struggling.
Trying to follow Jesus.
Trying to do what He says.
Trying to implement wisdom.
Blown off. Rejected. Ignored.
Disrespected. Teased. Back-stabbed.
Cold shoulder. Left out. Against me.
He said it would be like this.
He said it would be hard.
He said there would be pain AND joy.
I accept the challenge.
I surrender all.
I give up what I think is life to find True Life.
They reject You really, not me.
They are intimidated.
They don’t understand Your love and grace
to be more than rules and regulations;
Boring. Non-relatable. Apathetic.
But You are so much more.
You are Jesus, friend.
You are Spirit, with us.
You are Abba, Daddy.

It’s been ONE Month at NWC

On Monday it will be officially one month since I moved here to Northwestern. So much has happened in just this one month that it has felt much longer than that! I have seen my mom twice since they dropped me off 🙂 and I’ve seen the rest of my family once. Here are some serious (and some silly) Pros and Cons from the past month!
Some Pros:

  • I’ve met more music nerds here than I’ve ever met before! 😀
  • I can walk everywhere I need to go! No more driving 20 minutes!
  • There is a more even number of guys to girls here than at Schaeffer. 😉
  • I have listened to all of Bach’s Goldberg Variations for Counterpoint class.
  • By the end of Honors OT, I will have written my own summary book of all of the OT!
  • I can earn MONEY helping people with music theory!! 😀
  • I now have friends from Wisconsin, Hungary, Colorado, Illinois, more from MN, and lots of other places!

Some Cons:

  • I miss sharing a room with Jenna!!
  • It can sometimes be hard to find time (or places) to be alone.
  • I don’t have a piano in my room (though there is one in my building… otherwise there are ~20 practice rooms in Totino!).
  • I do homework ALL weekend and EVERY  afternoon/evening… except for last evening! Maybe I’m getting back into the swing of school and getting faster at writing all these papers and reading all of these books and articles. 🙂
  • Some of my new friends are struggling with difficult things.
  • I am struggling with past things that I never expected would come back up.
  • Too much cleaning! I HATE the strong smells of cleaner in our dorm every Saturday morning. 😛 haha
  • SO many people go home on the weekends! Good for getting homework done, but sad if you want to hang out or goof off with people who left.

Well, I’d better get back to those papers that I mentioned needing to write… 🙂 Adios for now, my friends!

First Two Weeks at NWC!

Hola! I’ve been so busy I could hardly think these past two weeks… but I think I’ve finally figured out somewhat how to manage my time well and get all the papers, readings, and assignments done! It has been such a blast getting started with classes, meeting SO many new people, and learning from amazing professors.
I have met many music majors and had some very fun conversations with some of them! I am in Counterpoint this semester. Counterpoint is an upper-level music theory course in which you learn how to analyze and write independent melodic lines that work together to also create vertical progressions. I am in a small class (6 total students) and everyone else knows each other already, but I have known the answers to questions and been able to answer a couple that I knew I had correct. My professor, Dr. Danek, has a crazy memory. He plays in class many excerpts from inventions and fugues while we are learning the concepts and tells us important things to remember about each of them.
I have been able to unofficially tutor a music theory I student already this semester, too! I am going to talk to the Alpha Center about tutoring because it’s a wonderful program: students get tutoring free and the tutors are paid by NWC! COOL deal. 🙂
I am in 3 honors classes: Public Speaking, Old Testament History and Literature, and History of Western Civilization. Speech is fairly straight-forward; Rhetoric with Mr. H prepared me well last year. 🙂 OT will be lots of paper-writing, but I think I will be very satisfied with the results at the end of the semester. West. Civ. will be SO much reading. We have a huge course packet filled with articles, plus 6 additional small books to read this semester. Good thing I’ve read some of these already with Mr. D and Mr. Phillips! It will be much easier to skim and remember rather than learn brand new material. In honors classes professors don’t give tests or quizzes, so we just do big projects and write many papers. I personally think this is pretty nice! It will certainly make finals week MUCH easier.
I have visited 2 different churches so far and will visit another new one this week. I really liked Bethlehem Baptist the first week; I would like to go back and visit again maybe next weekend. I was very convicted by Pastor John Piper’s sermon on the end of 2 Timothy 4. For worship they took hymns and “modernized” them (for lack of a better term). I enjoyed that immensely! Last week I went to Real Life Church. It was their Youth Sunday, so their youth praise team led worship and the youth pastor spoke about impacting youth. It was very interesting listening to a sermon like that from this side of high school; every time that I remember, I was IN middle or high school when hearing sermons like that. It was a strange feeling to realize that I am not one of them any longer and I now have a different role to play in impacting youth. I have the same role to play in college life that I used to in high school, but it looks different. That is something I have been thinking about and praying about a lot this week: what does it look like to impact college students? High schoolers? Middle Schoolers?? Wow… that requires some more thought.
Please be in prayer for a new friend of mine, Wade Weeldryer. I have not talked to him very much, but he is in two of my classes. His mother just died on Thursday evening from battling a very painful cancer. While his family is rejoicing that she is no longer in pain and that she is with her Savior, they are still grieving her loss.
You can also pray for the spiritual life of the students on this campus. I have seen some on FIRE for our LORD, but I have also seen some who need Him so badly…. it breaks my heart to see them searching for fulfillment in the wrong places. I want to be a light here; I don’t know what that looks like or how God might use me, but I trust that He can and He will, if I let Him. And I WANT Him to use me, even if I’m not “popular”…. I’ve never been popular, so no worries there. 🙂 God has given me an urgency for this campus; may He bring this to action here at Northwestern College. Go Eagles! Go Jesus!! 😀 Thank You for LIFE.

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